The life of a college student.

Mental Health Benefits of Good Company

Friends are an important part of anyone's life. I find it very difficult to believe that a person can be completely happy and feel fulfilled in solitude. It's a cliche that is truly beaten into the ground but genuinely good company is indeed hard to find. In my last semester of college, I have gone through a few groups of close friends. They come and go, we all move on a little bit and develop new connections while holding onto some of the more meaningful old ones. During this past year however, I feel as though I've really made some of the most sincere connections with people here. I think that in being forced to step out of the comfort of the best friends that I had my first couple years here, I was allowed to do my own soul searching and make friends that were rooted deeply in my own personal connections rather than through others.
I'm writing this because I've recently been reminded of how vital taking the time to enjoy the company of others is to maintaining my sanity in this crazy, mixed up college bubble. I need people in my life; people that mean something to me. I don't need adventure all the time either. There is something so therapeutic about laying on a couch surrounded by people I love talking about life and our issues and making fun of each other. I'm really doing my best to allow myself this time to breathe because I felt the results of not doing at the end of last semester. So much frustration built up inside me that I broke down. I had no outlet and rather than admitting to myself that I am human, flawed and in need of a shoulder to lean on once in awhile, I pretended that I was always okay. I have some amazing friendships in my life right now and I value every moment that I spend with them - I hope they know it.

Drug of choice.

Everyone has their own addiction right?

It is not an exaggeration that I get accused of being a caffeine-addict nearly once every day. This s not true. (Yes, I know that's what a real addict would say but TRUST ME.) I drink coffee rarely when I am not at college. In the summer, I go weeks at a time without it. But there is something comforting about sitting in an oversized armchair or sofa, curled up in a blanket or in a comfy hooded sweatshirt with a hot cup of joe. Some people have comfort foods; mashed potatoes, a pint of Ben & Jerry's, mac n cheese. Well I have a comfort beverage. So sue me.
My next big ticket item that will be on my christmas list next year is an espresso machine. I asked for one this year but decided I wanted a sexy leather jacket instead. (I don't have a place for an espresso machine...) I love to make my own coffee, it's like therapy. For 15 minutes out of my day all I am thinking about is how many scoops of coffee and which flavor creamer I am going to use. I know that I should be careful and monitor the amount of caffeine I actually consume to avoid future problems, but right now that's just not a priority. I don't really drink anything else with caffeine in it anyway; totally not a soda person. And hey, it could be worse. At least I'm not doing heroin.

People Person

I love people. My friends will often hear me say otherwise, but this is because the exception to my first statement are people who make stupid decisions. I dislike people who make poor life decisions. Overall however, I am often completely amazed by the dynamics of interpersonal relationships (of all kinds) and how each and every human being that I know is different from the next. You will never meet the same person twice and that is an awesome fact. This is why it is wildly entertaining to me that we spend so much time picking up "HOW TO" books on dating and relationships, or combating shyness, or the various other psychological issues that we Homo sapiens are inevitable carriers of. Personally, I think that psychology is a load of bull to begin with...Don't tell my psych friends...but I feel like if you spend enough time self analyzing and talking to your best friends until 5am on a living room couch you may be able to come up with the same diagnosis that a "professional" will offer you. Yes, an alternate point of view is often needed, but is that a skill? Arguable.
I've been learning a lot lately about how people work. I learned a long time ago that there is no universal manual to the human mind and no matter how much you think you know, you can never place a blanket statement over everyone in a certain demographic. I find myself often in a position of supplying advice, and I've started to instead dispense all of this information; that there really isn't any advice, only living. I do think that you can learn a lot from simply observing though. So much can be said in simple body language and a facial expression and I think we often overlook these human characteristics as trivial. Start paying attention to yourself and others.
Have you ever just sat somewhere and people-watched? I would find it hard to believe if the answer to that question was "no". It's human tendency to be curious isn't it? I mean, if that weren't the case, science would have never developed right? We were curious...about EVERYTHING. We needed explanations. So we made them. Maybe people-watching is a science - maybe not. Human interactions are complex and multifaceted and I love to absorb them. Everyone holds something special in them even if they don't know it, and it is this thing that allows them to give something special to the rest of us. Every life is worth living.

I was sitting in an academic building about a week ago studying for an exam I had about 20 minutes later in a nearby lecture hall when this tall stranger approached me out of the blue. I was surrounded by at least 20 other people in the room, maybe more, and he chose me. The first thing he said was "You don't look shy". I wasn't sure how to reply so I laughed and said "No, not generally". He then told me that he and his friend were standing across the room discussing their plan to make our college campus a friendlier, less self-centered atmosphere by attempting to get each and every student to take the time to meet one new person every day. It was all rather absurd, and the last thing on my mind with Cell Biology notes scattered all over my lap, but I listened. It was decided that the best way to start this movement was to recruit all the outgoing, fearless people to do so first so that then once the road was paved, the shy and timid would follow. And somehow, out of a room of 20-40 people, I was decidedly not shy. Amusing. Maybe it's the yellow coat. Of course the people in close proximity to me were also being taken victim to this strangers revolutionary ideas and I could tell by their uncomfortable smiles and fidgeting that they were uncomfortable. I was eating it up. This guy was making my day. Why are people so afraid of human to human interaction?

It all starts with a handshake.

The price we pay for brains.

When you're in high school skimming through the countless websites of the overwhelming number of colleges and universities on this planet, no one ever tells you how many thousands of dollars you will be in debt if you choose to continue down that path towards EDUCATION. Whether you choose to see it or not, we are brainwashed by everything around us at a young age that we must get a bachelor's degree if we want to "get a good job someday" and be able to live "comfortably".

Funny thing is, I spend more of my time teaching myself than some of my professors spend teaching me in classes that I am paying for. Why is this? It's amazing to me that I am in classes with at least 200 people on average, and as high as 700 in some cases. I know this is the price you pay for attending a large school but I still feel like there must be ways around this issue. I know the value of small classes...or even smallER classes because I attended one year of college at another, much smaller, university. I believe that the actual material students are presented with as undergraduates is pretty much the same across the board, however the education one recieves is different due to the modes of teaching that vary from school to school. There was one professor I had last semester who opened up the first day of class saying, "What I'm doing up here on this stage is not teaching. It is lecturing. I believe that teaching is a give and take process with student and teacher interactions and there will not be any of that here with about 600 students in the class. " He basically told us we didn't even need to show up. We could gain all the knowledge he would be presenting to us from our textbooks. So I didn't go. I got an A- in the class.

I wrote him an email during the semester saying that I agree with his views on teaching and that I think it is unfortunate that it seems so many classes, especially science oriented (arguably the most difficult to self-teach), that are offered at this school operate by someone standing on a stage in an auditorium flipping through powerpoint slides. I appreciated his honesty.

As I will be graduating this May, I have spent a fair amount of time reflecting on the past 5 years (total) of my experiences in college, both socially and academically. I have thought on numerous occasions about whether or not I regret transferring universities after my Freshman year...there are certainly pros and cons. I guess the biggest thing now is what will be in my future.